Learning to Live in the Present: What a Puppy in Midlife Is Teaching Me

I forgot what it feels like to be a beginner.

When you’re raising kids, building a business, running a household… eventually you start to feel competent. You know what you’re doing. You’ve done it before.

And then… you bring home a 13-week-old puppy.

Suddenly I’m using ChatGPT to learn about potty training and chewing. I’m researching sleep schedules, crate placement, the best chew toys for teething, how to train a dog to go to the bathroom on a balcony (condo life is real), and how often is normal for a puppy to need to go out.

Growth in midlife doesn’t always look dramatic.

Sometimes it looks like…

• Waking up earlier

• Being consistent when you’re tired

• Staying calm when there are potty accidents in the house

• Repeating the same lesson over and over without frustration

• Choosing patience instead of control

Ruby is teaching me that growth is less about perfection… and more about consistency.

It’s about slowing down.

It’s about going with this season instead of pushing against it.

This week I came across the final message from actor Eric Dane, who died at 53 after a battle with ALS. In a posthumous interview for Famous Last Words, he spoke about living in the present moment. He shared a simple example… watching a game with friends… and being fully there for it.

Just that.

Being there.

That hit me.

Because nothing forces presence quite like a puppy learning how to walk on a leash.

If I’m not paying attention, she just lays down in the middle of the sidewalk… and I end up dragging her without even realizing it.

I have to be there.

Fully.

No multitasking.

No half-paying attention.

No rushing.

And today, we just sat on the Intracoastal and watched the boats go by.

Jet skis. Motorboats. Sailboats. Big ones. Small ones.

Some of them were loud, and she jumped a little. Some of them she just stared at with that curious puppy look.

We weren’t doing anything productive.

We weren’t in a rush.

We were just… there.

Watching.

And it was kind of beautiful.

In this season of midlife — when the house is quieter and our roles are shifting, I didn’t expect a 13-week-old Cavapoo to be my teacher.

But here we are.

Having a puppy in midlife is stretching me in ways I did not expect and teaching me more about presence than any productivity book ever could.

Maybe the real growth isn’t just about training her.

Maybe it’s about letting this season slow me down… and learning how to truly be where I am.